The Magic 8 Step Formula To Success & Happiness Module 11 Section 2 Summary

Section 2 - Summary: Changing Non-Beneficial Habits and Behaviours

The following behaviours stand in the way of our attainment of success, happiness and fulfilment for ourselves:
1. Holding limiting beliefs
2. Anger
3. Guilt Feelings
4. False fear/worry

In this section we go over how to overcome these negative feelings to attain peace of mind.

1. Holding Limiting beliefs:

We have views of ourselves for every field and aspect of our life.

We can never function in any field in a better way then we believe we can function in that field.

The limiting beliefs we hold are limiting what we can and can't do.

We can change limiting beliefs by changing how we feel about ourselves, by raising our self esteem.

How do we change how we feel about ourselves? By auto suggestion.

Auto suggestion relies on the idea that the thoughts that most commonly occupy our mind with will turn into our reality through acceptance of them by our subconscious mind which about their realisation through opening it’s huge information resource, collected from our experiences and from our DNA, that allows us to notice and see opportunities when they arise and to have the courage to act on them.

Auto suggestion leads to the formation of new habits of thought.

Our subconscious mind uses all of its resources to allow our thoughts to become our reality.

We got our limiting beliefs from suggestions taken on from our parents and caretakers during our childhood years when we are not able to question these suggestions for being true or false.

Limiting beliefs form a fear of failure in a child and also a fear of success.
These children become people pleasers and do not fulfil their purpose of being happy, worthy and valuable human beings in the world.

The only way to change your beliefs is to replace them with beneficial beliefs of what you do wish to have.

There is only room for one conscious thought in our mind at a time.

We can choose if that thought will be a positive or a negative thought.

Our chosen thoughts add to the pool of information in our subconscious mind, from which all of our behaviours and actions come from.

We are where we are today because of the choices we have made which come from our thoughts and beliefs.

We will always act, behave and become the sum of our beliefs.

Clearing limiting beliefs requires replacing them with unlimited beliefs.

We do this by changing the way we view ourselves and the way we view the situations around us.

We do this through the exercise of finding our ideal self, and then holding the image of our ideal self in our mind, night and day (see lecture #15). This will allow room for the new you to emerge, slowly, but surely.

Everything we have in life is due to our thoughts, beliefs, and choices.

When we reach the age 18, our thoughts, beliefs, behaviours and choices become 100% our responsibility.

By taking responsibility we are acknowledging that our thoughts, behaviours and choices have got us to where we are today.

Taking responsibility is different than taking the blame for something.

Blame looks at the past and projects it onto the future, responsibility looks at the present and chooses what to do about the future.
By taking responsibility for all that we have in our lives, we automatically feel that we have more control over our life.
If we have created it, we can change it, or at least we can change our attitude about it.

We are not born with any negative emotions aside from two inborn fears; the fear of loud noise and the fear of falling. All of the other negative emotions we have are all learned.

2. Anger

Negative emotions such as anger have a very negative influence on our life as a whole.

In order to replace negative emotions with positive ones we need to change the following two behaviours:

1. We must stop identifying with a situation as being negative. We can always choose to view any situation in a positive light. The situation is never the cause of our negative emotion, it is our perception about it that causes our negative emotion. Thoughts are always the cause to every effect in our life. Our thoughts are always our choice. By taking responsibility for our thoughts and behaviours we can stop identifying with the negative situations. It is our responsibility to choose the right thoughts that will get us to where we want to be in life: successful, happy and fulfilled.
2. We must stop justifying the fact that we should feel negative in such a situation.
To do this we must stop blaming others for what happens in our lives and stop excusing our behaviours by justifying their rightness.

3. Guilt Feelings:

We tend to self sabotage any opportunities we have for success because of guilt feelings we are holding that prove to us that we did something wrong, or that we did not do something that we were supposed to do. Guilt feelings reduce our self esteem and prove to us again and again that we are not worthy of success and that we are not capable of success.

We get rid of guilt feelings:

• By never talking badly of ourselves
• By not letting others talk badly of us.
• By stopping to blame others for our situation
• And through forgiveness for others and ourself for any mistakes we may have made in our life. By learning what we don't want, we understand more clearly what we do want and therefore we should be grateful for people whom have wronged us, for they have shown us the path to our happiness through contrast.

4. Worry:

The negative feeling of worry has a destructive effect on our life.

It wastes our precious time and ruins our health by turning on the stress effect.

The best way to overcome worry is to have a plan in place if the worst case scenario that you are worried about, will manifest in your life.

Once you learn that you can cope with the situation if it does manifest in your life, then you free yourself from unnecessary false worry.

Plan for the worst but expect the best.

Once the plan of how you cope is in place, you can change your focus to what you do want in your life and work towards achieving that. Worry focuses on the future and does not allow you to enjoy the present moment which is the only real thing in your life.